Cluelessness or Lies?

I knew a woman once.... (I know, I know, not a far stretch from the common Greg phrase,"I knew a man once...")

Anyway... I knew a woman once who couldn't tell the truth even if it hit her right between the eyes. I'm not sure how JUDGEMENT DAY is going to play out as I am certain that this female individual could witness herself doing the very act of dishonesty and STILL turn around and attempt to deny or justify (but mostly deny) the VERY FACT of her dishonest action.

That said, I have the unfortunate priviledge of sharing 'parenting time' with this person. (Unfortunate for both me and the children) The problem here is that my children will tell me a lie and then when questioned about the lie they will do one of two things:

1. Deny that the phrase that they just said 2 seconds before even came out of their mouth.
2. Act as if the lie was a miscommunication and that it is your fault that you didn't understand that what they said is not what they meant.


H: Can I sleep in the loft on the couch?
Jen: Which one of your sisters told you to come in and ask me that question? Was it both of them?
H: No one asked me to come in and ask you.
Jen: Really? Because they both just asked me if they could sleep on the hide-a-bed in the loft couch and I told them ABSOLUTELY NOT!
H: But when I asked them they told me to come ask you.
Jen: ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Child, leave from my presence immediately! (or maybe it was more like "GET OUT!")

[Father then motions daughter toward him to try and make some sort of sense of it all]

Greg: So why did you tell Jen that your sisters DIDN'T ask you to ask Jen?
H: Because they didn't.
Greg: But you JUST said that they DID tell you to come ask her?
H: Oh?! I did?!
Greg: Yes, you did! In fact it was seconds after you said you didn't.
H: Huh?!
Greg: Don't act so clueless!

[Child begins to get a stupid grin on her face, probably in the hopes that acting cute will somehow make all around her become forgetful or immediately forgiving. This is a tactic she learned for another parent whom you can probably guess.]

H: Oh....

Needless to say this isn't the only daughter that elicits this behavior. The oldest is the most indocrinated in the ways of 'Cluelessness'. Its gotten so bad that often our phrase in response to her is, "Yeah, maybe in your world!"

Anyone know how to counteract the horrible effects of "Parenting time" on children of a woman with Borderline Personality Disorder?

Or maybe even just the task of teaching them to have a desire to be honest!


Andie said…
Have you considered a cattle prod for every time they tell a lie? Or quoting the scripture, "Wo unto the liar, for they shall be thrust down to hell?"

Just, kidding, but when you figure out what to do about it, let me know. They older Nolan gets the better liar he is becoming. Sad.

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